All behold, the almighty coin.
The concept is simple. The results are usually interesting at the very least.
We flip a coin to see if MSU will win or lose, and we justify it by predicting just exactly how they’ll reach that game’s outcome. In 2018 the almighty coin nailed the 7-6 record, but also predicted wins against the Penn State, Michigan and Ohio State gauntlet and losses against CMU and Rutgers.
Last year? The coin was a tad off with a 4-8 prediction, but got the Arizona State loss as well as the quartet of Wisconsin, Penn State, Illinois and Michigan losses correctly.
This year? Well, let’s find out.
Oct. 24 vs. Rutgers: Win
BANG, THAT’S RIGHT, THE MEL TUCKER ERA IS OFF TO A ROARING START.
Sure, it’s lowly Rutgers, but I would personally take a win over Okemos High School in Week One at this point. Anything to get the Mel Tucker regime started on the right note.
Rocky Lombardi joins the 15-15 Club™️ that I just made up — 15 rush attempts, 15 completions — in his first start of the new season.
Record: 1-0, suck it Rutgers
Oct. 31 at Michigan: Loss
Alright, not ideal, but whatever. Understandable, I guess?
The talent disparity could come into play this game as we all realize just exactly how much talent was lost on both sides of the ball from last year’s MSU squad. Essentially replacing eight starters on defense is too much to overcome as Heisman lock and Cam Newton’s Final Form Clone top the new faces of the Spartan Dawgs defense.
Record: 1-1 and prolonged misery on Twitter
Nov. 7 at Iowa: Win
Much like Mark Dantonio’s win over Notre Dame in his inaugural season, this will be the first solid win of the Tucker Era over a team with a decent brand name.
The game-changer here is, obviously, no fans at Kinnick Stadium to bring that weird Iowa voodoo magic that always appears in their home games. Neither fresh-faced starting quarterback throw for over 120 yards, but it doesn’t matter as Elijah Collins helps MSU eat up nine minutes of clock on the final drive before MSU punches the game-winner in for a 16-13 victory.
Record: 2-1 and a **** ton of crying Iowa fans
Nov. 14 vs. Indiana: Loss
Bad news: Michael Penix Jr. is still on the Indiana Football Hoosiers. He neared 300 passing yards in his three touchdown outing last year but (miraculously) MSU won that shootout. Penix is out for vengeance as Indiana looks for a big win sandwiched between the Hoosiers’ games against Michigan and Ohio State.
Nov. 21 at Maryland: Win
First off, I have to appreciate the glitch in Google right now that says this game will kick off at 7 a.m. If it were up to me, that’s the time slot all Maryland games would take place in.
Just like the last season, Maryland enters this game just beaten down by the rest of its season and wants to be anywhere else in the entire world than a football field. Tua Tagovailoa’s little brother, Taulia, throws three interceptions (two to Kalon Gervin, one to Chase Kline) and Anthony Williams has his first career 100-yard game for MSU.
Record: 3-2 and ROLLING, BABY
Nov. 28 vs. Northwestern: Win
From one (current) Indiana quarterback to another (well, a former one) as the Spartans get a shot at Peyton Ramsey’s Wildcats.
The defensive players from last year are licking their chops at this game as they all recall the abysmal outing that Northwestern threw at them. Confidence to get to a fourth win is at an all-time high, and MSU is even in a spot to play three different quarterbacks throughout the game.
Dec. 5 vs. Ohio State: Loss
MSU gets a great moral win here as they keep the Buckeyes within 35 points as Ohio State is looking ahead to their
slaughtering of game against Michigan the following week.
Just because I have PTSD from the 2018 game against the Buckeyes, I will assume the Buckeyes’ punter has no less than eight punts pinned inside of the five yard line during the game.
Dec. 12 at Penn State: Loss
James Franklin did not take a liking to MSU’s little run against his squad a few years ago, so he has the team fired up for this one. Sean Clifford had no problem throwing for four touchdowns in less-than-stellar weather last season, so on a cool December night he’ll duplicate that performance to send MSU into the crossover game with a 4-4 record. Huh, weird — the same odds of a coin flip.
All right, that presumably gets MSU in fifth place in the division. Let’s just call it that we are playing Illinois in the final crossover game.
Dec. 19 vs. Illinois: Win
Illinois cruises out to a 28-3 lead. MSU connects on a long passing play right before halftime that makes everyone just shrug their shoulders and say “ehh, probably won’t matter.”
Then the second half begins. MSU’s offense gets a little spicy and Illinois struggles to even move the ball. Deep into the fourth quarter, MSU converts a long fourth down to continue a game-winning drive. As the final seconds tick off the clock, Rocky Lombardi finds Trenton Gillison to push MSU to a 37-34 win.
Record: 5-4 (all right this is strange and every result is not far off what I would actually predict for the season)